A Little More Virus Levity

So, let me get this straight.  There is no cure for a virus that can be KILLED by sanitizer and hand soap.

I see a big baby boom coming in 9 months. They will be called the C-19 Babies and the #1 baby names will be Charmin and Scott.

Is it too early to put up the Christmas tree yet.  I have run out of things to do.

When this virus thing is over, I still want some of you to stay away from me.

If these last few weeks have taught me anything, it is that stupidity travels a lot faster then any virus on the planet.

Wait a minute— You’re telling me that my chances of surviving all this, is directly linked to the Common Sense of others?

People are scared of getting fined for congregating in crowds.  As if catching a deadly disease and dying a horrible death isn’t enough of a deterrent.

If you believe all of this will end and we will go back to normal once we reopen everything, raise your hand.  Now slap yourself with it.

Another Saturday night in the house and I just realized even the trash goes out more then I do.

Whoever decided a Liquor Store is more essential then a Hair Salon is obviously a bald headed alcoholic.

Remember when we were all little and our underwear had the days of the week on them. Those would be helpful right now.

The spread of Covid-19 is based on two factors.
1) How dense the population is
2) How dense the population is

People start coughing and pray they don’t have the Coronavirus.  I start coughing and just pray I don’t pee myself.

Remember all those times you wished the weekend would last forever.  Are you happy now?

Just did a big load of pajamas so I would have enough clean work clothes for the week.

It may take a village to raise a child, but it’s going to take a whole vineyard to home school one.

About oldmainer

I am a retired manager living in Southern Maine and a would be writer of poetry, narratives, short stories, and random opinions, and that's how Oldmainer was born. Recently, I decided to try an experiment. I added photography to the mix, using only a cheap cell phone with a limited camera and the editing software that came with it, and added the blog site Inklings at poormanspoet.wordpress.com to showcase the results. So, feel free to use whatever you find interesting or worthy, but please honor the terms of my copyright when and if you do. They may not be much, but they are still a piece of me. I appreciate your checking me out and hope that you find something that will encourage a return visit. Thanks for stopping by.
This entry was posted in Coping, Funny, Health, Humor, Laugh, Life, Perspective, Reflection, Satire and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to A Little More Virus Levity

  1. quiall says:

    I needed a good laugh and I certainly got one here! I’m going to quote these to people if you don’t mind. I’ll always give you credit. Have a good day

    Like

  2. scifihammy says:

    hahaha Thank you for the much needed laughs! 😀 😀

    Like

  3. So funny. LOLOL Put up the Christmas tree…Hahahahahaah why not, right?

    Like

  4. George says:

    LOL…these are priceless. I don’t know which is my favorite. Overtime I think I doI read another. Needed the laugh. Thanks, Bob.

    Like

  5. Good ones, thanks Oldmainer

    Like

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