I didn’t date in high school. Not that I didn’t want to. It’s just that I wasn’t prepared for a relationship. And the reason I wasn’t prepared is I had no money, I had no car, and I had no girlfriend. All were definitely serious impediments to dating. But, at least my parents never made a big deal out of it, although my Mom did mention a couple of times what a nice girl the ministers daughter was. Finding a girlfriend was strictly up to me, and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.
Why bring this up now? Well, because of an article I read in the paper yesterday. It was titled “Mom creates stir trying to find date for her son”. I mean, we are not talking the usual “have you met my son” or “did you know my son is single”? Oh no. This Mom was serious. Very serious. It seems her son is a college student and she was trying to get him fixed up for Valentines Day. In fact, she was trying so hard that the police became concerned.
The Baltimore Sun reported that “a woman in her 50s wearing a multicolored scarf approached students in two campus buildings last week, showing them a picture on her cellphone and asking if they would date her son.”. This apparently stirred multiple complaints from the “selected applicants”, resulting in the campus police issuing an “incident advisory” that included a link to pictures of the woman so that she might be identified. University officials say the woman isn’t being sought for a criminal investigation, but they do want the third-party propositioning to stop.
Now, let’s reflect on the son for a moment. There is no mention of what he thinks and my guess is, that has never been a concern in his family. Mom, I suspect, has always handled that for him. The fact that his Mom would show the would be candidates his picture kind of indicates he was no Alfred E. Newman, but then again, Mom’s have a tendency to see something in their sons that the rest of us may miss. Like, they know he is going to be a doctor. When he is seven.
With all the assistance he is receiving from the home front, what do you think the chances are that he will die a virgin. I’m guessing 90% or better. I do know this though. Given the efforts of his Mom, he is without a doubt, today, the best known student on campus. And, I suspect, the most miserable.