When I was a manager, the task that I disliked more then any other was preparing the annual performance appraisals of my employees. Each year, I would struggle to make pertinent comments while showing compassion. That was not always as easy as it would appear. Sometimes I would find myself entertaining a mental comment unbecoming a manager, but instead would carefully phrase it so the issue was addressed tactfully but hopefully, the criticism was constructive.
I am retired now, so I have more latitude. As such, I am putting together a few suggestions of what the manager says and what he/she would like to say. Hopefully, this will take some of the mystery out of the review process. Here we go.
Manager: This employee struggles to grasp the more basic responsibilities of the position.
Definition: This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
Manager: This employee should seek opportunities outside of their current area of responsibility if they wish to advance.
Definition: This employee should go far and the sooner they start, the better.
Manager: This employee often does not live up to the requirements of the job.
Definition: This employee sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
Manager: This employee believes their performance is above average.
Definition: This employee has delusions of adequacy.
Manager: This employee has difficulty with verbal communication
Definition: When this employee opens their mouth, it is only to change whatever foot was in there.
Manager: This employee requires a large degree of supervision
Definition: Must be watched constantly and only performs when cornered
Manager: As a supervisor, this employee has difficulty leading other people
Definition: His people would follow him anywhere, however, only out of morbid curiosity.
Manager: Since his last appraisal, no substantial improvement has been noted.
Definition: This employee has reached rock bottom and has begun to dig.
Manager: Significant improvement is required if this employee is to remain in their present position.
Definition: This employee would be over their head in a puddle.